The weekend

I had a really sh*tty weekend. And I mean that in a literal sense. Yes, the trend of my “el sicko” weekends continued and I awoke in Johannesburg on Saturday morning with the worst case of diarrhoea I’ve ever experienced. Ever. As in ever ever. Oh, woe was me. I just can’t believe that my weekends have evolved into two days of absolute misery. Every week. Ad infinitum. It just goes to show that you should never even greet a person with a bug. Ever. Truly, from this very moment onwards, if you’re sick, don’t even expect one word of sympathy from me. Ever again. Because, clearly, my capacity to commiserate is more the propensity to share your bug than to show compassion from a (safe) distance. No thank you. Sorry, all of you sickos. Too bad. I will happily send you text messages from the other side of the planet. Just stay away from me, all of you bug carriers. I don’t like your bugs and I don’t want to share in them ANY more.
.
Believe me, I tried to enjoy my weekend. I really did. We had a fab journey to Johannesburg. I was totally excited to be driving on a highway again. I was absolutely elated to be driving on a dual-lane freeway again. I was really happy to see my friends again. And they spoiled us rotten! Joey and Pierre - thanks!!! You really made us feel welcome and Buttercup is pining away for Maxy... But oh, the very pit of deepest darkest despair to awake with the bug biting me on Saturday morning. On the only weekend we’ve been into the city since we’ve been in the bush. Just my luck. I didn’t even get to enjoy ONE cappuccino in ONE coffee shop. Poor me. And I had counted the very hours to the first opportunity to drink in the aroma of my fave café’s… But, alas, it was not to be. Instead I savoured the décor in numerous restrooms. I relished the soft, dry, squishiness of toilet rolls. Especially when there was more than one (toilet roll) in the cubicle.
.
It was so bad I seriously considered skipping my friend’s wedding on Saturday. And I was the musician for the wedding. So you must know then. I was des-per-rate. But, luckily for me, my ex-fertility-doc was also a guest at the wedding and she brought me some kick-a** meds that put a stop to my crappy situation in it’s tracks. For a few hours. And then the meds wore off and I spent the remainder of the wedding and the weekend holed up in many different ablution facilities. Not a pretty site. Me, nor the ablutions.
.
And that was my weekend. Come Monday, as USUAL, I’m feeling better. But still pretty grrr… I am still running for the loo every couple of minutes. But at least I have a loo just metres from my office and I’m the only one who uses it. And I’ve not eaten much since Saturday morning either, so at least there’s not much that needs to be evacuated either. Ahem ahem. And the food at the wedding looked sooooooo good too. Boo hoooo!
.
But the wedding itself was truly spectacular. My friend Lisa has married into a really gracious, kind, loving family. I was gobsmacked by their home though. Think White House proportions. Truly a home of magnificent magnitude and old-world grandeur. Lisa and Cobus looked really happy on their day too, and the wedding was traditional, but casual and really beautiful. Very romantic! Lisa and Cobus – I know you guys are going to be incredibly happy together, and I want to wish you both God’s richest blessings for your future. May you have wisdom and riches like Solomon and descendants like Abraham. Haha.
.
Now, please excuse me so that I can go and throttle the guy who shared his bug with me.