The new regime

... so after my nice long rant yesterday, my hubby and I decided to take the plunge and dive head first into our New Year's exercise routine. On the fourteenth of the month. Better late than never, I always say.

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A bunch of church friends were already swimming their four hundred and twentieth length, when I donned my costume and stood at the poolside clutching my towel, wishing I could come up with a valid excuse to get out of swimming contemplating this enormous step I was taking. It was when I spied a ten-ton-tessy swimming in the end lane that I decided enough was enough. I dropped my towel on the spot and eased into the water before anyone could notice my spongy thighs and un-waxed nether-regions. If you know what I mean.

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I was rather proud of myself after doggy-paddling through six lengths. And that, on an empty stomach too. PLUS, I even did the breast stroke for half a length here and there. It's like the hardest swimming stroke to do. Especially if you have an aversion to frogs and every time you do the sprawl you picture frogs' legs... Now that's what I call super serious about getting in shape, ya'll.

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I worked up quite an appetite. So as hubby and I were pulling out of the parking lot at the school I said, "So, how does some KFC sound as a reward for swimming?" Now, now, before you all start sniggering at my dedication and self-discipline, the power was still out. And how could I cook if there was no electricity?

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That's my excuse and I'm sticking with it.

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So, we stopped at KFC. If it's any consolation, I went with the healthier option. One Smokey Cheese Wrap, thank you very much. It came with chips and a can of cooldrink. What was I supposed to do? Throw the chips away?

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Over my dead body.

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Waste not, want not.

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But, I elected to have a TAB instead of a Coca Cola. Muuuuuuch healthier. And less fattening. And sugar free. And caffeine free. Clearly the better option for my new lifestyle. I even told the lady behind the counter that I would rather have the Tab because I'm trying to lose weight.

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I should have kept my mouth shut.

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She immediately burst into a spasm of raucous laughter. "What? You? Lose weight? In your dreams!"

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Who could blame me for having the coca cola after that?