I feel good!

I can't explain it any other way than peace. I'm really at peace with our decision to adopt. It's like there's suddenly this knowledge that it's all going to work out right.

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Usually I have to try really hard not to be one of those people who base decisions on feelings. See, things don't normally need to make sense to me, in order for me to do something. It just has to feel right. Well, my stint in infertility has forced me to be more careful. I've had to watch watch watch... Watch everything that I eat - no more emotional eating. I've had to watch everything I drink - no more cappuccino's all day every day. I've had to watch my spending - fertility treatments steal all your bucks - so no more shopping sprees. Watch watch watch. Be careful.

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And now that we're adopting, suddenly I feel less frivolous. I'm going to be a mom sometime soon (hopefully!) and that means I have to be more responsible now. Less doing as I please. More planning. More patience. More parent-style behaviour.

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And it feels BRILLIANT! Finally, something in this JTBP (journey to becoming parents) feels right! Maybe I'm cut out for this, after all. Who'd have thunk it?

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P.S. Thanks for all the great ideas for celebrating my birthday, guys. Please forgive me if you get sprayed with the sarcasm dripping from that statement. Just kidding. I guess, I'm the only one that's really that excited about it being my birthday soon. Granted, even I don't jump with joy when a birthday is looming. Love the presents, of course. Growing to dislike all the fuss though. When did the sparkles die on my birthdays? I must be getting old.