It's weird how infertility works. Wait, how infertility works with me. (My body's a bit odd. Even in infertility circles. Mmmm. What's new, right?)
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See, there's this huge sensitivity surrounding new babies. For obvious reasons. You want one. You can't have one. Others can. And so it's a bleugghhh place to be. And because your friends / family love you and don't want to hurt you, announcing your pregnancy to an infertile can turn into something very tricky and something akin to a horror show... I actually feel so sorry for all of you guys that have had to tell me you're pregnant, by the way! I can see the agony written all over your faces and I really love you even more for handling me with kid gloves on!
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While I'm loath to admit it, it hurts MORE to hear that someone's pregnant (especially those unplanned pregnancies) than to hear the baby's actually arrived. Maybe it's because I've had 9 months to get used to the idea, by the time the little okie actually pops out.
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The funny thing is that usually by the time I'm told someone is pregnant, I already know. And not because I've already heard it via the grapevine, but because I think I've developed a rather clever babe-dar. Other people have gay-dar. I have babe-dar. It's this premonition that I get around preggy women. I really couldn't tell you how I know. I just do. Maybe it's my proximity to their happy hormones. Mine are SO all over the show, that when I'm around a preggy woman, I just KNOW it, sometimes even before they do. And then when they find out, it's like a game with me to see how long they take to tell me they're pregnant. I know, I'm terrible! Oh well.
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I think what might make it easier for them to tell me, maybe, would be the knowledge that I really am happy for them that they're pregnant. I'm so relieved that they don't have to go through what Robin and I do. I'm not jealous of them. That would be a relatively easy emotion to deal with.
.
See, there's this huge sensitivity surrounding new babies. For obvious reasons. You want one. You can't have one. Others can. And so it's a bleugghhh place to be. And because your friends / family love you and don't want to hurt you, announcing your pregnancy to an infertile can turn into something very tricky and something akin to a horror show... I actually feel so sorry for all of you guys that have had to tell me you're pregnant, by the way! I can see the agony written all over your faces and I really love you even more for handling me with kid gloves on!
.
While I'm loath to admit it, it hurts MORE to hear that someone's pregnant (especially those unplanned pregnancies) than to hear the baby's actually arrived. Maybe it's because I've had 9 months to get used to the idea, by the time the little okie actually pops out.
.
The funny thing is that usually by the time I'm told someone is pregnant, I already know. And not because I've already heard it via the grapevine, but because I think I've developed a rather clever babe-dar. Other people have gay-dar. I have babe-dar. It's this premonition that I get around preggy women. I really couldn't tell you how I know. I just do. Maybe it's my proximity to their happy hormones. Mine are SO all over the show, that when I'm around a preggy woman, I just KNOW it, sometimes even before they do. And then when they find out, it's like a game with me to see how long they take to tell me they're pregnant. I know, I'm terrible! Oh well.
.
I think what might make it easier for them to tell me, maybe, would be the knowledge that I really am happy for them that they're pregnant. I'm so relieved that they don't have to go through what Robin and I do. I'm not jealous of them. That would be a relatively easy emotion to deal with.
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NOTE: I came back to edit a spelling error & just lost the rest of this post!!! Boo hoo... can't believe it. Oh well. Sorry. Can't remember what I had written here, but think it might have been something to the effect of: love you lots, glad you're preggy, am so happy to have you in my life and wish for you only the very happiest and easiest pregnancies. And to thank you for loving me enough to put up with me raining on your preggy parades. I wish I was a better friend than I am! I'm trying though! lots of xxx
3 comments:
Hiya -
Thanks for stopping in on my blog to say hello. Of course I don't mind if you pop in and read - hope you don't mind the odd swear word. I used to work with some people from South Africa and I would have to say that it is my all time favourite accent. Take care!
Cheers!
Char:
Thanks for visiting me! We live in Georgia (U.S.), but we have new friends in our homeschool group who are from South Africa.
To answer your question, I designed my own blog template. It's a hobby of mine; I've been teaching myself the last few months. I sat up a little site at http://barefootblogs.blogspot.com, but I don't really publicize it. You can find free ones to download if you do a google search for free blogger blog templates.
I am exactly the same with the baby radar :)
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